Gloves will soon be off

I'm not closing the inside door. I don't care that the screen door doesn't close all the way. That squirrel isn't going to scamper right in the door, even if he could squeeze through the crack. Sure, he's slammed against the window a couple times today and scrabbled along the wood frame as though trying to enter through the window, but that's just him being clumsy as he misses the roof or leaps off the nearby tree after lapping up the last bits of suet. I'm certain of it. Mostly.

I don't mind squirrels. They're not as cute and charming as chipmunks, but they're fun, rambunctious little guys. I didn't even mind that they started gunning for the suet. When I moved it to a much more accessible spot after using its original branch to hang the fuchsia plant, I expected some raiders.


But I'm learning something about the wild here. The word gets out about good grub and more creatures come. We've had several squirrels and chipmunks, with clear recollection of where the suet lies. The suet has been gone since this morning, but they keep coming back, licking and gnawing at the residue on the container. One baby squirrel with a slim red tail dared to venture close though he's the most skittish, and was recently chased off by a large gray squirrel who I initially took to be his parent. Perhaps not.

I'm beginning to wonder if they know that the suet came from us. It clearly wasn't hanging there in that odd little cage before we started showing up a month ago. If we put it out there, and we live inside, perhaps we keep more food inside as well.

OK, no joke, just this second, a large gray squirrel crept up from the other side of the house, curving around and across the front step, eyeing me as he passed by. I chased him off. I think another was on the roof in a different direction, trying to distract me at the time.

I'm going to get my knife. I can't believe I don't own a gun.